Social Anxiety

When interacting with people, people sometimes feel fear, nervous, and even feel anxious. Many people blame this performance on their shyness, but this performance is Social Anxiety. From a cognitive therapy perspective, there is a significant difference between shyness and social anxiety. Shyness is a short-term psychological problem. After overcoming the initial shyness, you will not experience social anxiety anymore. And social anxiety makes people think that they will do something that is degrading or embarrassing, and that other people are pointing at themselves, so people become pessimistic and cynical. In stressful situations, daily activities such as talking to strangers or calling with relatives and friends are significant obstacles for people with social anxiety. Three main ways to overcome social anxiety. Overcoming social anxiety not only allows people to better demonstrate their strengths but also makes people more enjoyable than afraid of social processes. First, reduce self-focus. When people pay too much attention to themselves, it is difficult to pay attention to other things accurately. “You can only get less information, such as what others say, the expression on your face, and their reaction to you.” Based on this information, you will quickly. If you know that others can understand your inner activities, you will be pointed at you. Self-concern is the core level of social anxiety and needs to be prioritized. A few suggestions to help you expand your attention: One is to remove your attention from yourself. You can try to do exercise. In a calm environment, focus on yourself, keep it for two or three minutes, and then turn your attention to the outside world for another two or three minutes. Another suggestion is to make up your mind not to think about the experiences that make you unhappy and to focus on what is happening around you. “The more curious you are to others, the more interested you are, the more you will pay attention to what others are talking about, and the less you care about your own symptoms and fears.” She also suggests that you should fully mobilize your curiosity. You can think of yourself as an expert in social studies. For example, you can observe the way people say goodbye at the airport gate, observe people’s age, familiarity, mood, people accompanying them, and so on. This simple observation will make social anxiety people understand that there is no such thing as a “right” way of social behavior, and you don’t need to feel uncomfortable with your behavioral patterns. Second, change the direction of thinking. The fear of social anxiety comes mainly from the opinions of others. For example, in some social situations, social anxiety people generally have a hunch to be criticized. Ideas can affect your feelings.

Conversely, feelings can also affect your thinking. Changing your mindset can make you feel better. How to change the mindset? Two strategies: First, learn to recognize the thoughts in your brain and figure out what you think when you feel anxious. Many social anxiety people have their negative habits. For example, when someone leaves when they speak, they believe that this is specifically for themselves. For example, the heart will habitually assume some responsibility that is not their own. If you can identify these negative conjectures by recording, questioning, and reflecting, then the change will be easy. Another strategy is to find a useful mindset. Good thinking patterns can generally be expressed in fairer and milder language; they can alleviate your stress and help you look at things in a more balanced and flexible way. For example, when you want to monitor your progress, don’t use compulsive vocabulary such as “must” or “should”, but use “if I…will be better” to motivate yourself. Third, change the behavior pattern. Trying new behavior patterns will help you explore more practical and beneficial mindsets. For example, you will be more open, ask more questions, and make more friends. Changing behavior patterns requires you to abandon your safety behavior. Safe behavior is what you do to protect yourself in social interactions, such as looking down at others to look away from others. Safe practice will reduce your confidence and “effectively” help you escape the attention of others. You can put your security behaviors into a list and then gradually discard them. Changing the behavioral pattern also requires you to face reality. Social anxious people can identify what they want to avoid, clarify their ideas and the connections between them, and then change their usual practices in action, that is, “face to fear instead of avoidance,” and finally evaluate the consequences. Know if your expectations of the results are correct. Does social media make you happier or more worried?

The emergence of social media makes people’s lives more convenient, but also makes people more anxious. Too much attention to the things brushed out in the circle of friends will make people lose happiness. What does social media mean for you? In contemporary society, social media has become a part of everyday life, and people are used to communicating with others, opening up their horizons, and relieving the pressure of reality. It seems that technological advancement is pushing people in a better and better direction. But the facts may not stop there. The role of social media is quite complicated. There are also some negative effects behind the seemingly enjoyable brushing of Weibo and friends. Through a series of “China Social Media Impact Reports” released by consulting agency Kantar in recent years, we can more fully examine the role of social media in life.

Six bad habits using social media

Social media has become an essential platform for interaction between modern people, friends, and colleagues. But some bad habits of using social media can affect your relationships. Take a look at the bad habits of using social media below. Are you recruiting?

Play on your mobile phone and ignored others.

When your friends or loved ones want you to watch something on TV or want to play a piece of music for you, they may be interested in getting into the experience instead of focusing on their phones and tablets. When you find that you are still browsing the web to aggregate content or emails without giving them full attention, they will feel a little annoyed and frustrated. If you are not so interested, want to see something else or do something else, then you can clearly say it. Focus on one thing, not on one-mindedness and superficial things.

Share “Love Three and a Half Months” on social media

Social media breeds a false belief: all your friends and fans care about every moment of your life. In the past, we only shared content with some people, and now it can be seen by hundreds of people. But not everyone cares about updates like “67th day after the wedding” and “three and a half days of love”. Even your partner may not be able to evoke enthusiasm for this negligible “important event”. When sharing such things, the amount is less and better.

Send a “cheeky work sticker”

Listen, we are paying attention to you on Facebook, and because you like them and are very interested in interacting with you. In other words: we are your friends and not customers. Promoting your plan on your social page is cheeky and unnoticed. It’s okay to send a post to invite your friends to like your work page, but be sure to make a clear distinction. Don’t use your account to use your friends to benefit your work.

Post everything you eat

Many years ago, people prayed before meals. Today, they take pictures of food. They discussed what filters to display the scones better, and then they wondered why the scones were already cold. Just eat it.

In the social media “show muscles”, send fitness photos.

Although I am not a fitness expert, I am sure that you should use all your energy for exercise at the gym, not on the Instagram with our muscles, or the hips that are not quite upright. Imagine if you spend all your time and energy on lifting a 24kg barbell instead of taking a picture of a barbell, your body will become great. Even if no one knows you, your efforts to go to the gym will not be wasted.

Add unfamiliar “friends.”

The older generation, as a latecomer to Facebook, tends to add people they know but who have not encountered in their lives as friends. The younger generation believes that it is a big deal to receive requests from other people’s friends, which will create a sense of alertness, because privacy may be violated. People of all ages need to make the right choices. A good rule of thumb is never to add people who have not seen in real life to friends.

Five ways to build your personal brand

Everyone in the Internet media era needs to build their own personal brand. Personal brand has the following advantages: Quickly accumulate industry reputation, affecting the industry in your industry, is a huge bargaining chip for your job promotion. Establish a personal IP, and spread the value of your ability to a broader range of people to create a long-term iron rice bowl. I will explain how to build a personal brand from five dimensions. Use product thinking to clarify your brand positioning. Use channel thinking and choose the right channel for cognitive construction Use content thinking to complete the personal brand Use active thinking, be good at borrowing and become the protagonist of the topic Use data thinking and feedback to promote your brand upgrade

1 How to position yourself and find your brand positioning?
Self-analysis, clarifying your strengths and strengths, and understanding your shortcomings and weaknesses, Set yourself in a long-term goal in areas where you are best at and most interested, that is, in which area you want to establish a personal brand, what personal IP is set up, and which people are affected. Dismantle the big goals, break down the small goals that can be achieved in a short period from the ultimate goal, and list the resources and capabilities needed to accomplish these small goals, while repeatedly comparing the ultimate goals in the implementation of the phase objectives. And always correct and rectify with your actual situation

2. How to choose the right channel for cognitive construction?

Cognitive construction is a series of positive, logical, and purposeful enhancements to other people’s work to deepen his impression of you. Identify the audiences you want to influence and identify the channels that you can reach and influence. In these channels, it is exciting and severe to reinforce your “personal setting,” which is the character set.

3. How to complete the personal brand’s momentum?

This is the work of the content we are talking about. You need to do three things in the selected targeting areas and channels: Continuously output content, keep updates and update frequency, so that users have stable expectations. Continuous learning and accumulation; Quit messages that cause conflict or interference with your personal location, and don’t show them.

4. How to be good at borrowing and becoming the protagonist of the topic?

What is the borrowing power? Borrowing power is to clarify one’s own needs, to get help with goals and strategies, and to achieve goals. It can be divided into two types: borrowing from hot and popular brands and borrowing from hot topics. Leverage is the ability that every master who operates a personal brand has. There are three points I want to remind you to pay attention to: It is necessary to clarify the objects that can be borrowed, such as the predecessors in the same field, to help you to endorse the brand, or to the audience that has influence and brand needs, and let him complete the word-of-mouth communication as your user; It is necessary to learn to understand the needs of others, so that when the cooperation and the momentum are created, the key points can be grasped. For example, the “ice bucket challenge” actually meets the needs of celebrities who need to establish their public welfare image; Have the initiative to help people’s mind and open mind, others ask you to help, within the scope of what you can, can contribute as much as possible, after all, do not know when, you may need someone’s help.

5. How to be good at feedback to promote your brand upgrade?
The correct result orientation requires two points; one is “data first,” and the other is “propose and verify the hypothesis.” But this is just a means, and most importantly, you need to collect feedback to self-adjust and optimize and iterate your personal brand. The specific practical steps to guide the brand iteration with feedback are generally three steps: Find out the trends and unusualities in the data by publicizing the data and the data already in the inside, and analyze the reasons; Make assumptions and come up with your solution; Verify the solution and continually optimize the solution and improvement through verification. The whole process is: discovering the problem-hypothesis-verification-optimization cycle process.

The above five parts are the methodology of the system to build a personal brand.

Social media Help you or Kill you?

Social media, which is now closely related to our life, whether you want or not, you have to face it every day. Sometimes it does bring convenience to people, but sometimes it does cause trouble. Can social media save you time or wasted time? Here are some things you need to know.
Social network advantage

1. Global connectivity
Whether you are looking for a former college roommate, your first teacher, or an international friend, there is no easier or faster way to connect than through social media. While Facebook, Twitter, LinkedIn. There are also new sites that pop up regularly and are dedicated to getting people connected and interacting via the Internet. Through these websites, individuals make new friends or business relationships, or extend their foundations, connect and friends with friends of friends, and more.

These connections can help with a variety of things like:

Looking for date
Seeking new jobs
Positioning assistance
Access and provide product and service referrals
Receive support from like-minded people
Make or accept opinions on professional or personal issues
In many ways, all sectors of society are in the general store or in the virtual equivalent of church networking meetings to exchange news and get updated friends and family. The snail mail pen pal has been replaced by a virtual avatar and sent a private message via a social network.

via:, Ukraine – October 17, 2012 – A logotype collection of well-known social media brand’s printed on paper. Include Facebook, YouTube, Twitter, Google Plus, Instagram, Vimeo, Flickr, Myspace, Tumblr, Livejournal, Foursquare and more other logos.

2. Real-time information sharing
Commercial social media
Many social media sites integrate instant messaging capabilities, which means you can exchange real-time information via chat. This is a great feature for teachers to use to facilitate class discussion. Also, the Internet is the ultimate online book purchase. Students no longer need to take out a collection of six libraries at a time. What they need, knowing that they can find a lot on the Internet. Schools are not the only ones that set this type of real-time information sharing, which can be beneficial. Social media can provide a tool that managers use in group meetings to use meeting participants and update attendees and business people as a means of interacting with customers or potential.


3. Free advertising
Whether you are a non-profit organization that needs to get a word about an upcoming fundraising event or a business owner who promotes a new product or service, is there a better way to get your message in front of millions people,24/7? The best part is that it can spread free words through social media. Can promote a product, service or concept, or many, because you can only invest through limited time and you want to spend.

Social media disadvantages

1.A face-to-face conversation is endangered
A considerable advantage, these social groups have a side effect of reverse, but also a significant drawback of social: they reduce or eliminate face-to-face society. Due to the autonomy provided in the virtual world, individuals are free to create a fantasy person who can pretend to be someone else.

It is hard to say no, it is rude or neglected when you are looking for their eyes. It’s effortless and quick to dismiss a friend or stop following someone or stop their efforts to make a connection. With just one click, your question. Unfortunately, this online society deceives people’s opportunities to understand how to solve the Internet’s external conflicting functions, which can hinder or weaken the development of a person’s social skills.

2. Risk of fraud or identity theft
Whether you like it or not, the information you post on the Internet is that almost everyone smart enough to access it. Most thieves need a small portion of personal data that makes your life a nightmare, and if they succeed in stealing your identity, it can cost you a high price.


3. waste time
A report explains that socializing can be a big waste of time, and 17% of our online time is not productive. While this is true, some of the time it was likely to be used to make and maintain substantial commercial, social or professional connections, it is also true, it is easy to become distracted and ultimately spend valuable time on games, chat or other unrelated activity. Facebook users spend about six hours a month on the site, while social networking sites spend more than three times as many other online businesses as emails.

This is really up to you
Because social media is still a relatively young network trend, social or not is harmful, it is still unknown. Like any other type of system or social club with individuals becoming involved, this is doing homework and making sure you know that you are entering a good idea. Understand the terms of use, regulations, and identify issues such as security and confidentiality.

Take responsibility for your safety and integrity, and never join just because it is fashionable, or something your friends are doing. In assessing the strengths and weaknesses of social networks, it is best to be cautious and make mistakes. After all, the lack can have a devastating effect.

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