When interacting with people, people sometimes feel fear, nervous, and even feel anxious. Many people blame this performance on their shyness, but this performance is Social Anxiety. From a cognitive therapy perspective, there is a significant difference between shyness and social anxiety. Shyness is a short-term psychological problem. After overcoming the initial shyness, you will not experience social anxiety anymore. And social anxiety makes people think that they will do something that is degrading or embarrassing, and that other people are pointing at themselves, so people become pessimistic and cynical. In stressful situations, daily activities such as talking to strangers or calling with relatives and friends are significant obstacles for people with social anxiety. Three main ways to overcome social anxiety. Overcoming social anxiety not only allows people to better demonstrate their strengths but also makes people more enjoyable than afraid of social processes. First, reduce self-focus. When people pay too much attention to themselves, it is difficult to pay attention to other things accurately. “You can only get less information, such as what others say, the expression on your face, and their reaction to you.” Based on this information, you will quickly. If you know that others can understand your inner activities, you will be pointed at you. Self-concern is the core level of social anxiety and needs to be prioritized. A few suggestions to help you expand your attention: One is to remove your attention from yourself. You can try to do exercise. In a calm environment, focus on yourself, keep it for two or three minutes, and then turn your attention to the outside world for another two or three minutes. Another suggestion is to make up your mind not to think about the experiences that make you unhappy and to focus on what is happening around you. “The more curious you are to others, the more interested you are, the more you will pay attention to what others are talking about, and the less you care about your own symptoms and fears.” She also suggests that you should fully mobilize your curiosity. You can think of yourself as an expert in social studies. For example, you can observe the way people say goodbye at the airport gate, observe people’s age, familiarity, mood, people accompanying them, and so on. This simple observation will make social anxiety people understand that there is no such thing as a “right” way of social behavior, and you don’t need to feel uncomfortable with your behavioral patterns. Second, change the direction of thinking. The fear of social anxiety comes mainly from the opinions of others. For example, in some social situations, social anxiety people generally have a hunch to be criticized. Ideas can affect your feelings.
Conversely, feelings can also affect your thinking. Changing your mindset can make you feel better. How to change the mindset? Two strategies: First, learn to recognize the thoughts in your brain and figure out what you think when you feel anxious. Many social anxiety people have their negative habits. For example, when someone leaves when they speak, they believe that this is specifically for themselves. For example, the heart will habitually assume some responsibility that is not their own. If you can identify these negative conjectures by recording, questioning, and reflecting, then the change will be easy. Another strategy is to find a useful mindset. Good thinking patterns can generally be expressed in fairer and milder language; they can alleviate your stress and help you look at things in a more balanced and flexible way. For example, when you want to monitor your progress, don’t use compulsive vocabulary such as “must” or “should”, but use “if I…will be better” to motivate yourself. Third, change the behavior pattern. Trying new behavior patterns will help you explore more practical and beneficial mindsets. For example, you will be more open, ask more questions, and make more friends. Changing behavior patterns requires you to abandon your safety behavior. Safe behavior is what you do to protect yourself in social interactions, such as looking down at others to look away from others. Safe practice will reduce your confidence and “effectively” help you escape the attention of others. You can put your security behaviors into a list and then gradually discard them. Changing the behavioral pattern also requires you to face reality. Social anxious people can identify what they want to avoid, clarify their ideas and the connections between them, and then change their usual practices in action, that is, “face to fear instead of avoidance,” and finally evaluate the consequences. Know if your expectations of the results are correct. Does social media make you happier or more worried?
The emergence of social media makes people’s lives more convenient, but also makes people more anxious. Too much attention to the things brushed out in the circle of friends will make people lose happiness. What does social media mean for you? In contemporary society, social media has become a part of everyday life, and people are used to communicating with others, opening up their horizons, and relieving the pressure of reality. It seems that technological advancement is pushing people in a better and better direction. But the facts may not stop there. The role of social media is quite complicated. There are also some negative effects behind the seemingly enjoyable brushing of Weibo and friends. Through a series of “China Social Media Impact Reports” released by consulting agency Kantar in recent years, we can more fully examine the role of social media in life.